Jesus Socks

I am really enjoying myself this Christmas season. I have the extraordinary pleasure of having a three year old to celebrate with. Of course, it is so wonderful to celebrate Christmas with everyone from a new baby to a great-grandmother; however three year olds are just set apart from the crowd this time of year. Last year they had a ball opening gifts and eating sweets, and of course, they learned a lot and retained a little about traditions and the origin of Christmas. But at three, they are asking "why" all the time, and it catches me off guard when I see how many of my responses are remembered and taken seriously. Very seriously.

"What is Christmas? Why's it called Christmas? Why do we get presents? Why we eat together? Why we decorate a tree? Why did we get a BIG tree?" And on and on and on. As a mama who not only believes in Christ and wants her children to understand what we are celebrating, I am just tickled pink to hear comments like, "Oh, I'm gonna make Jesus a card for his birthday" and when pointing at the Christmas stockings hanging in our house, my little one said, "Those are Jesus socks." She came up with that one on her own, by the way. While shopping for groceries, we made a detour to the bakery for some cake watching, which always keeps the kiddies happy. Usually at the bakery I hear something along the lines of, "Look at that princess cake! I want that one for my birthday." But this time I heard, "Oh, Mama, I wanna get that cake for Jesus for His birthday!" Love, love it. I mean, of course there have been some moments of "I want this for Christmas," but when I take a few deep breaths and calm down after hearing the "I want, I want" chant, I realize that I really did much to create that problem myself by strolling through the shiny toy section at the store with the kids in the cart. What was I thinking? But for the most part, it has been not only a joy, but a lesson, to listen to my kid this December.

When my kids have a birthday coming around, I ask them how they want to celebrate. I try to shape the celebration around their likes, interests, and wishes. It's not my birthday, it's theirs. So after listening to my three year old talk about throwing a huge party for Jesus, that's just what we're gonna do. Red velvet birthday cake and all. Okay, so that's MY favorite cake, but I don't think Jesus would mind. I mean, it does look pretty Christmasy, you know. And we will put His name on it. But I don't just want it to be about the party. December is always full of charity bashes, food drives, and really great things like that. These things seem like something Jesus might want us to do, right? I want my family to be as involved in all those wonderful giving opportunities as possible. I don't feel like I've been commanded to celebrate Christmas, but I also don't feel commanded to celebrate any one's birthday. But I do it because it's a really cool way to show someone that he or she matters to me. And I'm gonna try my darnedest...(yes, that's a word...don't question it...I was raised on it...) to not get stressed about decorating and cooking and wrapping and shopping. Because that's just silly. This is a time set aside to celebrate. And I know that if someone threw me a birthday party, and it was a really nice party, but I watched that hostess stress herself out and go into debt buying things that weren't really that important, then I would be heartbroken. What's fun about watching someone you love make herself miserable for you? Seriously.

Now I'm sure I encounter people everyday this December who don't put or maybe don't even want to put much focus on Christ during this time of year. Me, I'm just gonna celebrate what I'm gonna celebrate. I don't want any judgment coming in my door or out of my mouth, especially this time of year. Anyone who wants to have a happy holiday season is welcome to do so with me....no matter if we see eye to eye. I mean, it's Jesus' birthday being celebrated, so I'm gonna try to go by His guest list...not mine.

The Power of Words

I have been in love with words since I was a little girl. The way they can be moved around and placed together to form a beautiful or clever or meaningful statement has fascinated me from the time I first began filling up journals in elementary school. I remember sitting in my Kindergarten class stressing over a basic test because I saw that the words we were being tested on had many different meanings, and so it was really an impossible task to only circle one picture for each word the teacher read aloud. I could make up a story in which each word could fit every single picture my teacher put in front of me. The way words fall on my ears is important to me, and the way they look on paper is something that can drive me a tad bit insane. Now not only am I a lover of the written word, but I am also a Bible reading gal, which let me tell you, brings me to a whole new level of word obsession. There are only so many "red letters" in my Bible, and so it is only good and natural that I really take time to ponder how they were placed together, and not just in my language, but in the original language they were written in. I mean, would I only study Shakespeare in Spanish or German, when I could look up the original words of the writer? Okay, so there you go...I obsess over words. I think about words a lot, and I do not think they are things to just throw around in a casual way as we go through our day. Sometimes, most of the time really, people should think about what they are saying, hearing, writing, and reading. But, alas, this is such a strange concept for us in this texting while watching television age.

Now, I am actually ranting about words for a reason here. I happen to think that children are wonderful gifts. There really is not a sweeter gift to be entrusted with here. Sure, being a parent can be stressful, but that's just part of the "saltiness" of the deal (see my first May blog post for clarification on "saltiness"), and stress does not take away one itty bitty ounce of the special blessing a child is. So, why oh why oh why, do people in the grocery store or at the park or a gas station or wherever tend to comment on how crazy a mother is for having another child? "You're expecting another? Have you lost your mind?" "Another girl," they will say, "Well, you are gonna have your hands full." "You'll have three teenagers all at once? I don't envy you!" "Just wait until those little girls grow up and the boys start calling and coming around and wait until they don't want to listen to you." And then the stranger in the pasta aisle will say, "Enjoy the time you have with them now because they won't want anything to do with you when they're 16."



In what world are these statements appropriate to make to a woman in the grocery store you do not even know? And in what world is this the best choice of words for even your closest friend? I mean, I know that parenthood will grow into a more and more challenging role for me, but come on, people. I also know that I hope and pray and expect the best out of not only my children, but also myself. I know that what I want to be for my family is realistic, yes, but also optimistic. I want to expect great things for my children, and not to have my little girls hear from the mouths of strangers over and over again just how difficult they are going to make my life. Because then they just might grow up to be difficult, and they just might learn to hate themselves a little for believing themselves to be nothing more than a nuisance to the people around them. Why not be what is expected of them? Of course teenagers have a tough time and so do their parents...I mean, look at this broken world they are trying to grow into. But calling out toddlers and babies still in the womb for being stressers and trouble makers and nothing beyond curfew breakers and bathroom hogs? Seriously, adults in the world, stop pointing your fingers at my tummy and name calling and complaining about the life you and your own situation created for yourself.



So the next time I see a pregnant woman at the grocery store, I will not say, "Oh, honey, what are you thinking bringing a child into this world?" I will say to her, "Oh, congratulations!" or "This is such an exciting time for you!" Or you know, I might even pray for her unborn baby...pray that he or she will grow up to be a light in this world, rather than just another wailing infant who will grow into a wailing teenager.

Don't get me wrong...sometimes mommies need to take a breath and laugh and cry about the chaos that is often their lives, but I think I will also spend my time surrounding myself and my husband and my children with words to encourage us and strengthen us, because as I am so often reminded by frank, tummy-touching strangers in the check-out line, we're going to need all the strength and encouragement we can get.



If this post seems a little meaningless to you, then think about the words from your past. I bet you can remember some of the moments in which you heard the kindest and also the coldest words about you in your life. And these words probably shaped you in some way. Maybe they helped you love something about yourself, or hate something about your family, or maybe they convinced you of something about your life. Words often have real power behind them.